A breath of fresh winter air

December is a time when the weather gets bleak and there is not enough sun or daylight. Amidst the freezing weather, it is the spirit of being with family, a warm cozy crackling fireplace, or an occasional cup of hot chocolate with marshmallows that helps the mood. Then, comes the New Year, a time to reflect back on the past year and think about what went well and what could be done better. We all have resolutions and plans and everyone hopes to follow them. However, not everyone follows their resolutions and somehow their busy lives start to take over.

People usually think about their lives when they are not busy. “Busyness” is a culture that is seen as glamorous and idolized in the United States. Everyone is always “busy”. If you are not busy, somehow you must be a looser or not successful. When did we start to associate success with “busy”? Also, when did we start thinking that “busy” people are more productive? The real answer is that constantly “busy” people are not the most productive. If you have good time management skills, you will not be busy 24 hours a day. Also, many people spend too much time on unproductive things and don’t know how to prioritize their time. This leaves them in the busy cycle all the time. The concrete jungle of New York is a haven for “busy” people. They fill every minute of their day with things to do and love to over-commit themselves. They also tend to look down on people who are not as busy as them.

In the workaholic world that we live in, sometimes it is good to take time to breathe. Once in a while, it is nice to take time to enjoy the aroma of a morning coffee or to pick up a tiny snowflake and see what it looks like. Once in a while, it is good to be a little child that sees wonder in little things.

Thanksgiving week in Paris

I was in Paris this Thanksgiving week. The city of lights and love, fashion and culture, cozy cafes and holiday markets. Hundreds of years of history are packed into its wide boulevards and monuments. In the last three days, I was in the Latin Quarter area (le Quartier Latin), the intellectual hub of the city pulsing with curiosity, rows of academic bookstores, ethnic restaurants, and chatty cafes. One cloudy morning, I took a stroll along Rue de Saint-Jacques. Most of the stores were closed, but a few boulangeries were open and the warm glow of the light from them contrasted with the gray skies. Some cobblestone streets away, I saw a morning flower vendor slowly assembling different pots of colorful fresh flowers. A few elderly smiling faces were queing up to buy the morning baguette from the boulanger. A baguette in one hand, they quietly went about their lives. For a moment, I thought about my own fast paced life, and realized that time waits when you want it to. I never really felt like a foreigner and my minimal french did not discourage anyone from talking to me. You can walk into any cafe and in a few minutes you will find 'friends' who want to talk to you.

In the prestigiuous Champs-Elysees, the holiday markets had already opened up. The vendors were selling everything from stuffed animals (made of animal fur) and Russian Matryoshka dolls, to hot cholocolates and crepes. One afternoon, I climbed the 255 steps to the top of the Cathedrale de Notre Dame. I saw the city, with creatures that have been looking out to the city for hundreds of years with history etched into them - the gargolyes. When a stranger becomes a friend, a city will not feel as foreign or strange, but as a familiar place, a place you know you will return to.

Fall in Central Park

Homer and the Crayon

Homer, the character from the Simpsons - not the Greek poet, had a crayon stuck in his brain for all those years, which explained his below average intelligence. Apparently, it was stuck there because of a childhood incident that involved shoving crayons up his nose. After the doctor removed the crayon, Homer’s IQ improved considerably, enabling him to bond with this intelligent daughter, increasing his intellectual aptitude, and improving his logical reasoning. However, Homer soon found out that increased intelligence comes at a price. He was not enjoying normal activities and could not fit in with his friends.

Does high intelligence and reasoning come at a price? The answer is ‘yes’. People with high IQ scores tend to be analytical and think more than people with low scores. They reason and find more flaws in normal day to day activities. This impacts their ability to live and let live. In the end, considerably high IQ may also mean less happy thoughts because as many say, “ignorance is bliss”. The more you think and analyze, the more you realize that there are so many ways things and events can go wrong.

Unfortunately, schools and universities focus solely on IQ by giving standardized tests and other exams. They ignore one of the biggest predictors of future success – EQ or emotional intelligence. People with high EQ tend to know how to react and deal with everyday situations. They may not necessarily be the most logical or analytical, but they are smart with people and the world around them. The most successful of people are the ones who know how to use both forms of intelligence and create a balance.

In the Simpsons episode, Homer eventually had the crayon put back into his brain, because he could not deal with the world of intelligence. Being smart and reasoning with the world is not easy, but using our talents and intelligence in a way that benefits the world is essential. We are all different in our abilities and we all have different strengths. If you are highly intelligent, don’t reason or get disappointed with the world, but use it to the fullest and in the most creative ways.

Park Ave Samosa

Last week, walking along a wide boulevard sipping warm masala chai, I reached to grab a hot samosa from the to-go bag. While the aroma of potatoes and Indian spices were slowly filling the air, it dawned on me that I was walking on a prominent street, Park Avenue. The sophisticated patrons were giving me looks while I was munching on the samosa. No matter how many caviar canapes or lobster bisques I have, the best food to me is what I grew up with. Our culture is a part of us, and people who deny it are denying their own identity. In the world of ethnic assimilation, we all bring small identities with us, mingling, eating, and sharing different customs, but our core still remains; it is what makes us unique.

A solitary violinist

The statue of Hans Christian Andersen, the legendary storyteller, reading the 'ugly duckling' to the attentitive duck is not easy to miss for a visitor to Central Park. One can see children and families from different nationalities climbing on the statue and taking photographs. Every photograph of the statue is a memory engraved forever in an album in a distant land or becomes a digitized imprint. While sitting on the bench next to the statue today, I started reading ‘The Soloist’ by Steve Lopez, a non-fiction book about a talented homeless violinist. Engrossed in the book, and amidst the laughter of the children climbing the statue, I could hear the faint sounds of a violin coming from the distance. I curiously looked around to decipher the origin of the sound, but couldn't determine the direction of the melody. The evening sun was peeking through the verdant august trees and bushes in the west, the summer breeze gently blowing the leaves. As I picked up my belongings to head back and walked in that direction, the music was becoming more and more audible. At the end of the conservatory pond was a solitary violinist, exceptionally talented, and creating beautiful music for the visitors - a soloist. Some of the best things in life are free, and can be discovered only if we pause, observe, and reflect.

An Empty Stranger

What are they missing, I thought? In some villages in India, some of the poorest people have the widest and most genuine smiles. Why is it that among the swarms of the wealthy, handsome, and beautiful, I don’t see the same smiles?

The more we have, the more we seek. As humans, we are naturally inclined to not be satisfied with what we have. Greed has caused wars, destroyed families, and fueled an endless need for creating money. On the other hand, greed has also driven humans to venture, discover, and create the extraordinary. I can spot a random stranger in the city, usually a fashionista or a busy professional; an empty feeling encompasses their tough exterior conveying a feeling of unhappiness. There is an overwhelming feeling of emptiness that many residents face, amidst the power and quest for exceptional wealth, beauty, and popularity.

On a positive note, some people living in the city will strive to be part of the cultural or business elite and will work hard with a drive and determination not found anywhere. These people will be successful. New York is what you make of it and if you do not get influenced by the constant demand to be the best at everything, you can be a happy person like anywhere else in the world, maybe even as happy as the smiling villager.